Hello, my discerning readers, Roger here, your guide through the jungle of jaw-dropping relationship sagas. Today, I’ve stumbled upon a story so peculiar, it might just make you cancel your next dental appointment out of sheer solidarity. Or perhaps it’ll send you running to your bathroom to brush your teeth till your gums bleed. Whatever your reaction, I assure you, this is one HotTake you won’t forget anytime soon. Remember, this is a real story from a real person on Reddit. Truth is stranger than fiction, and frankly, much grosser too.
Picture this: a loving relationship between two seemingly compatible souls, blessed with a pug and two adorable toddlers, all living their best life. Except for one minor hiccup — the fiancé has declared an all-out war on oral hygiene. Yes, you read that right. Our leading lady has been battling her fiancé’s aversion to tooth-brushing for their entire six years together. The cherry on top? He’s been seen using the edge of a water bottle to scrape off plaque. Dear readers, I couldn’t make this up even if I tried.
Now, allow me to set the scene a bit more vividly. Our first kiss — magic in the air, right? Nope, just the haunting whisper of oral neglect, misted with the lingering scent of dinner. Turns out, our man was nicknamed after a family friend notorious for a toothless grin, thanks to a lifetime of dental disregard. Romantic, isn’t it?
Fast forward to the present, and our damsel in distress is seriously wavering in her attraction to her plaque-collecting prince. Intimacy? A distant memory, overshadowed by the terror of being near those pearly whites — or should I say, ‘pearly’ might be a bit of an overstatement.
Now, she has attempted to address this sticky situation delicately, even venturing to find non-minty toothpaste alternatives. Alas, to no avail. With her fiancé out of town most days, opportunities for dental intervention are as scarce as his toothbrush sightings.
So, here we are, at a crossroads. How does one broach the subject without inciting a full-blown oral hygiene rebellion? Or has the time come to deem this a dealbreaker, putting the kibosh on this love story — leaving our heroine to find a man whose teeth see more action than just a bottle scrape?
**Roger’s Hot Take:** Let’s not beat around the bush, or the toothbrush, so to speak. Love might be blind, but it certainly doesn’t need to hold its nose. This tale is less about the aversion to minty freshness and more about respect and self-care — cornerstones of any thriving relationship. If our leading man can’t be persuaded to adopt even the most basic hygiene practices for the sake of his partner and family, one has to wonder what other basic courtesies are being neglected.
While this story is almost Kafkaesque in its absurdity, it underscores a non-negotiable truth: Mutual respect and care in a relationship extend to all aspects of life, including dental hygiene. So, to the distressed damsel, it’s time for a come-to-Jesus meeting with your fiancé. No ultimatums, just a heartfelt talk about the importance of health, hygiene, and mutual attraction. If he values the relationship, he’ll pick up a toothbrush. If not, then maybe it’s time to ‘brush off’ this relationship.
Until next time, keep your standards high and your toothbrushes wet. Roger out.
Original story
I legitimately cannot believe that I’m even having to type this out, but here it goes… I (24F) am completely un attracted to my fiance (26M). We have been together for 6 years and have a pug and 2 kids (3 years M,2 years F). My fiance WONT BRUSH HIS DAMN TEETH. I handle the kids’ teeth because I can’t trust that he would actually brush their teeth. This has been an ongoing thing— like he doesn’t even have a toothbrush. I have witnessed him brush his teeth maybe 4 times out ENTIRE 6 YEAR RELATIONSHIP.
Our first kiss— I noticed his bad breath, but thought it was because we had just had dinner prior. Then his childhood nickname (ie Jack is his name and the nickname is Greg) I thought was odd. Later to find out that his family called him “Greg” because they had a family friend (named Greg) who never brushed his teeth and they all fell out/rotted out.
It has just gotten progressively worse to the point where he will sit on the couch and scrape his plaque off his teeth with the opening of a plastic (single use) water bottle. It gives me the biggest ick. And then he views me as the asshole for not wanting to make out with him, etc.
He also refuses to go the dentist. The kids and I go every 6 months religiously. It’s getting to a point where I cannot be intimate with him. Making out? His teeth gross me out. Him eating me out? Even worse, I don’t want those unwashed plaque ridden choppers down there.
But, at the same time this feels like a super sensitive subject to bring up to him. How do I approach him/it gently. Or is this enough to be a dealbreaker?
Also— I have mentioned it in the past. He hates the flavor of toothpaste I guess. I bought him special toothpaste that wasn’t minty and he never used it.
EDITTED TO ADD- He works out of town 5/7 days and works 1 day a week local (but wakes up 2 hours before me). The other day, I work so I’m up before him. This has been our arrangement almost our entire relationship (him working out of town and way earlier than me).