Hello, hello, my beloved audience! It’s your favorite connoisseur of conflict, Roger, diving headfirst into the suburban jungle where the lawns are green but the neighborly love isn’t always serene. Today, I’ve stumbled upon a real Reddit story from a real person that’s so juicy, it makes the Hatfields and McCoys look like a garden party squabble. So, buckle up as I dish out Roger’s Hot Take on a tale that’s as tangled as the ivy in your backyard.
Our protagonist, a seemingly peaceful homeowner, has lived in harmony next to their neighbor for half a decade. But as we know, in the world of fences and boundaries, tranquility is often a facade waiting to crumble. One winter morning, as innocent as a snowflake’s descent, the neighbor decides to erect a chain link fence. Ah, but herein lies the rub – this metal barrier, a mere skeleton of suburban demarcation, wasn’t planted on the fertile soils of mutual agreement but rather, encroached 40 inches into our hero’s realm. Yes, dear readers, the sprinklers that once kissed the grass on both sides found themselves exiled to a land beyond reach, sparking the great Fencegate of our time.
Now, in a twist befitting a Shakespearean drama, our protagonist, with visions of a ‘For Sale’ sign dancing in their head, requests the simple relocation of this metallic intruder. The neighbor, a character as slippery as a garden eel, offers not solutions, but rather, a series of eyebrow-raising proposals – from moving sprinklers to purchasing swathes of land for mere pennies. The audacity! Each offer more ludicrous than the last, culminating in the pièce de résistance: a gift of the very fence that started the war.
Ah, but let’s not forget the shed! This isn’t just any shed, my friends. It’s a monument to practicality, housing not just a tractor but the very heart of the pool – its pump and filter. To move such a sanctuary would not only be a logistical nightmare but a financial whirlwind, all because of a fence that simply wasn’t content with its own backyard.
As our protagonist stands firm against the tide of absurdity, they ponder the nuclear option – tearing down the fence themselves. Is it a descent into anarchy, or a reclaiming of sovereign soil? This is where your flamboyant arbiter of disputes wades in, martini in hand and monocle adjusted.
**Roger’s Hot Take:** In the grand theater of human folly, this is less a question of ‘Am I the Asshole?’ and more a testament to the sheer resilience in the face of neighborly audacity. Our homeowner hero isn’t just defending their turf; they’re upholding the sacred principles of property rights and common sense. To the neighbor, I say, ‘Move thy fence, for thou art the trespasser and art creator of thine own misery.’ This isn’t just about land; it’s about respect, boundaries, and the sanctity of one’s shed.
In conclusion, dear protagonists of your own suburban dramas, let this tale be a lesson. As much as we champion peace on our little patches of earth, sometimes the gloves must come off, and the fences must come down. Stand your ground, protect your sheds, and never, ever let someone’s chain link folly disrupt your zen garden. Until next time, remember – in Roger’s garden of wisdom, the grass is always greener on the side where boundaries are respected. Cheers, until our next hot take!
Original story
I have lived at my house for 5 years with no problems with my next door neighbor until now.
He put in a fence along our side yards this winter with no survey and since there was snow on the ground, you could not see the sprinkler heads. A few weeks ago, I went to turn on my sprinklers and it turns out the new fence is on my property as my sprinklers heads are on the other side of the fence now. I normally wouldn’t care about this part of my yard, but I plan on selling my house this year and in order to sell things have to be up to code.
I asked my neighbor if he could move the fence over (it’s a chain link which makes it easy to move), and I told him that I plan to sell. He stated it was all good because he already hired someone to come and move my sprinkler heads over so then it wouldn’t matter.
I told him no to moving the sprinkler heads as when a survey is done for the sale of the house, the fence is still on my property and will need to be moved, and then the sprinkler heads won’t be in the right spot and will need to be moved back. He refused to cancel who he hired so I was able to reach the guy and cancel myself.
So I asked my neighbor again to move the fence, to which he offered to buy my house for cash for what I owe on my mortgage, not for what the house is worth, which I would lose a ton of money on the deal so I told him no, and he would still need to move the fence for the sale of the house anyway.
So he said in that case he would pay to have a new survey done, and buy the property off me that his fence sits on. He also tried twice again to send the guy back to move my sprinkler heads, but I stopped it again both times.
Yesterday, the survey was done and it was determined that the fence is 40 inches on my property. The fence is touching the back of my shed. My neighbor again asked to buy my property and make the fence the new property line. To which I again said no because the city zoning laws state my shed has to be at least 36 inches from the property line. So my shed is compliant with the current property line but would need to be moved if the fence became the new property line. (It also turns out his shed is on my property too).
His response was that he would pay to have my shed torn down and rebuilt with a smaller shed as mine is too big anyway. I again said no as my shed not only needs to be that size to store my tractor in the winter, but it also houses my pool pump/filter, so moving the location of the shed would require redoing all the piping and electrical. This would cost thousands of dollars and it would be very complicated.
I again told my neighbor he just needs to move his fence as this is the simplest and cheapest option. He is willing to spend thousands of dollars on these other options instead which makes no sense. His latest response is now that he has gifted me the fence and if I want to move it I can. He is refusing to do anything else now and that I am being unreasonable. AITA if I just tear it down this weekend?