Buckle up, folks! Because today, we are diving into a story hotter than your Aunt Karen’s fourth flaming margarita at the family BBQ. And trust me, it’s all based on a real life Reddit post that will make your head spin quicker than a roller coaster at Coney Island.
So, let me paint you a little picture. Meet our protagonist, a 24-year-old fabulous woman (let’s call her Emily for the sake of privacy). Emily has been in a blissful relationship with her 26-year-old fiancé (we’ll call him Jake) for a whopping seven years. They’ve been through it all, including welcoming a pint-sized bundle of joy a year ago. Sounds peachy, right? Well, not so fast…
Enter Lora, Jake’s mother. Lora was married to Jake’s stepdad, Mike, for over 20 years until she decided to have a little extra-curricular activity that led to divorce. Since the infamous infidelity, Lora has been on a dating spree that would put The Bachelor to shame. From an abusive boyfriend named Joe to a whirlwind romance culminating in a marriage to some guy named Ben she met a month ago, Lora’s love life is straight out of a melodramatic soap opera.
Now, here’s the juicy part. Emily and Jake are planning their wedding for September, and Lora decides to stir the pot by announcing she’s bringing her new hubby-of-five-seconds, Ben. Not only that, but she does this via a melodramatic family group chat announcement, because why talk things out when you can drop a bombshell on WhatsApp, right?
Emily, naturally, is not happy about this. Why, you ask? Well, besides the fact that Lora’s selection criteria for boyfriends seem to lack any logical or ethical parameters, her history of pushing every Tom, Dick, and Harry into the family has created enough drama to feed the plot of a reality TV show for at least three seasons. Let’s just say, Emily and Jake aren’t too thrilled about the idea of another one of Lora’s ‘projects’ wrecking their matrimonial bliss.
Oh, and did I mention that Lora has already managed to tattoo Ben’s initials on herself within a month of meeting him? Yep, Lora has the discretion of a teenager in a tattoo parlor after midnight on Spring Break.
So Emily turns to Reddit in frustration, asking if she’s the asshole for telling Lora that her ‘new family’ is not welcome at the wedding. Oh darling, gather ’round because the verdict is about to be served hot.
First off, let’s make one thing clear: Emily is not the one coming out of left field here. When you’re planning a wedding, the last thing you need is unnecessary drama. Weddings are like fine-tuned productions, and throwing in a character like Ben—who’s practically a stranger—can quickly turn it from a fairy tale into a logistical nightmare starring an unwanted plus-one who thinks open bars are drinking games.
Secondly, let’s talk about boundaries. It’s bewildering that Lora doesn’t seem to grasp the concept of respecting her son’s wishes. Newsflash, Lora: respecting boundaries isn’t optional. It’s essential. Inviting someone neither the bride nor groom is comfortable with is the equivalent of holding a midnight rock concert in a library and acting surprised when people start shushing you. It’s just not done!
And can we take a moment to appreciate the audacity of Lora’s expectations? She’s practically dictating that Emily and Jake accept Ben into their lives posthaste, without giving anyone the chance to adjust. This entitlement is about as appealing as week-old sushi—no, thank you.
So, what’s Emily to do? Should she stick to her guns or bow down to the impulsive whims of Future Mother-in-Law of the Year? Well, grab your popcorn because it’s opinion time, courtesy of yours truly, Roger.
If I were Emily, I’d be holding my ‘No Entry’ sign up higher than the gates of Buckingham Palace. Lora’s track record with her ahem new love interests is spotty at best, and introducing yet another in her lineup of questionable characters right before the big day is asking for trouble. Emily is well within her rights to request a ‘no new additions’ clause for her wedding, particularly when it comes to her sanity and peace of mind on that special day.
Also, Lora’s manipulation tactics, like the sudden announcement of her marriage to Ben, serve as red flags waving more vigorously than a matador’s cape. Emily’s primary responsibility is the well-being of her child, her fiancé, and herself. Dropping unsolicited and barely-vetted family members into the mix is like adding ghost peppers to your grandma’s mild chili recipe—unnecessary and disastrous.
So my final take? Emily, you are not the Asshole. In fact, you’re a hero in the making, standing firm against the storm of your MIL’s erratic whims. Draw that line in the sand, girl, and if Lora gets her garter in a twist, well, she can take it to the group chat. Your wedding, your rules.
Original story
My MIL is ridiculous. Me(24F) and my fiance(26M) have been together for 7 years.
My MIL (51F) let’s call her (Lora) You may think I’m being dramatic. Long story short (kinda) my MIL divorced my fiancés step dad(55M) of 20+ years (2 1/2 yrs ago) because Lora cheated.
Let’s call ex step dad(Mike) Mike was and is an amazing and a great father figure for my fiance and his siblings. Since then Lora’s been off the rails.
Lora started dating an awful man named Joe whom the whole family hates. My fiance and I welcomed our child into the world a year ago.
From the day i literally birthed this tiny human Lora has tried to push Joe into our child’s life along with push him onto the family. After multiple arguments and him threatening her life she finally broke up with him when my child was 5 1/2 mo old.
Since then she started dating again (so 4months after the breakup with doucheface). MIL met Ben 1 month ago and since then she told me that she will be bringing Ben to our wedding in September and that I need to get my fiance on board with this.
I told her my fiance does not want her boyfriend there because of what happened with the last boyfriend. She got her first tattoo with Ben’s initials in it.
My fiance does not like this man and MIL does not respect my fiances boundaries. MIL now announced via family group chat that her and Ben are married as of today.
She then texted us again and said that we now have to accept Ben into our lives and now he can meet our child and my fiancés siblings twins that are due to be here in December. So Lora refuses to respect our boundaries.
Would I be the AH for telling my MIL that her “new family” as she keeps saying is not allowed at our wedding in September.
I know this seems very one sided but Lora is not a smart women. Her and I had a great relationship for 4 1/2 yrs then everything has gone to shit once she cheated on Mike and she ruined all relationships with her 3 kids.
Update: Yes my fiance would like me to stay in contact with Lora because she is our child’s grandmother and my fiance doesn’t want to exclude Lora from our child’s life unless necessary. Just thought I’d add this cause a lot of people have presented their concerns with my staying in contact with her.
I will update more soon