Hello, darlings, it’s Roger here, coming at you from HotTakes with yet another juicy story straight from Reddit’s bustling alleyways of personal conundrums and moral standoffs. Picture this: a birthday dinner hijacked by a boyfriend’s vision, leading to secret tears in the bathroom and a do-over dinner party. Yes, you heard that right. This is a real story from a real person, and oh boy, do we have opinions to dish out. So, buckle up, and let’s slice into this birthday cake of discourse, shall we?
Imagine the scene: you’ve been looking forward to your birthday dinner, dreaming of that perfect evening where everything from the ambience to the guest list is just as you want it. Enter Alex, the boyfriend with a heart of gold but perhaps a listening ear made of tin. Our birthday girl clearly communicated her wishes—her dream restaurant, the intimate guest list, and the low-key vibes—only to have them tossed aside for Alex’s version of a birthday bash.
Now, Alex, bless his heart, decided to sprinkle a bit of his own flavor into the mix. A different restaurant, a table with decorations loud enough to make a peacock blush, and a guest list featuring those ‘friends’ you wouldn’t share a raft with in shark-infested waters. Our girl does what many of us would: cry in the bathroom, muster a smile, and endure the evening. And oh, the drama doesn’t stop there.
Post-disaster, our birthday girl decides to take matters into her own hands. She organizes the birthday dinner she initially wanted, effectively hitting the redo button on the whole affair. Alex, however, is not pleased. His pride is hurt, and his friends are echoing his wounded ego, branding our girl as the architect of his humiliation. Now, this is where we pause for a second—since when is celebrating your own birthday the way you want it an act of war?
Before we dive into Roger’s Hot Take, let’s mull over a few things. First, communication is key, folks. Our girl laid out her wishes clearer than a summer’s day. Alex’s choice to diverge from the plan might have been well-intentioned, but good intentions pave the road to a birthday dinner disaster. Second, it’s crucial to understand that in relationships, sometimes it’s not about you. Birthdays, in particular, should orbit around the person whose birth we’re celebrating, right?
Now, for **Roger’s Hot Take**: are we really prepared to brand someone an antagonist for wanting their special day to resemble their wishes? My dear readers, the answer is as clear as vodka. No, our birthday girl is NOT the antagonist here. From where I stand, with my high heel firmly on the ground and martini in hand, she’s just a person who wanted her birthday to feel like her birthday. Alex’s bruised ego doesn’t warrant him a victim card, especially when the dinner was more about him than her.
In the spirit of birthdays and do-overs, let’s raise our glasses (or forks, for those indulging in cake) to celebrating ourselves and not letting anyone, boyfriend or otherwise, dictate how we should savor our moments. At the end of the day, darlings, it’s not about the drama; it’s about understanding, respect, and maybe just a little bit of sparkle—on your own terms.
Remember, it’s okay to reclaim your day, particularly when the first attempt feels more like a party for someone else. So, here’s to the birthday do-over, and may all your celebrations be just as you wish them to be—full of joy, laughter, and perhaps a lesson or two on listening.
Until next time, this has been Roger, serving you a slice of hot take with a side of sass, right here on HotTakes. Cheers!
Original story
My boyfriend, I’ll call him Alex, wanted to plan my birthday dinner this year. I was not keen on this because I hate making a big scene and he likes it, also, I had a restaurant in mind already…basically I knew what I wanted and I just wanted to do that. Alex said he at least wanted to plan/host it. I said okay.
I gave him all the information on what I wanted. Mind you, my dad always pays for my birthday dinners (we’re not big on gifts so he normally just picks up the tab for whatever celebration I have instead), so when I had thought about what I wanted budget had not been an issue.
Alex was very secretive during the planning but he said I would love what he planned and considering I had written out a full page of what I wanted I didn’t think anything of it.
But when he drove me to the dinner, it was at a completely different restaurant, one I don’t hate but certainly not where I’d want my birthday, he’d invited some of his friends who I don’t like, and had decorated the table even though we were eating in the main part of the restaurant which drew unnecessary attention. I was horrified. I went into the bathroom, had a little cry, and then pretended to have a fun evening, even though all my friends knew this would upset me.
I told Alex afterwards how upset I was and he was offended. He said he couldn’t afford the party I wanted so he’d planned an alternative which I think is a stupid excuse because I never asked him to pay. Eventually I settled it saying I appreciated the effort but in future I will be planning my own events.
So I did. I planned a do-over dinner at the place I wanted, with the guest list I wanted, and the menu I wanted.
Alex is really mad about this, saying it’s embarrassing for him. I think he had the dinner he wanted – because a dinner that didn’t take into account what I wanted was not for me – and now I’m having the dinner I want. He’s really not letting it go and his friends agree I’m humiliating him. AITA?