AITA for Not Celebrating My Son’s Achievements Like I Do for His Sister and Cousins?
Grab your popcorn and buckle up, folks. Today, we’re diving into a tale straight from the hallowed halls of Reddit’s AITA (Am I The Asshole) board, where a father—who, let’s face it, probably has a trust fund’s worth of family drama—is navigating the treacherous waters of parental favoritism. Or maybe just trying not to spontaneously combust from sheer dad-ness. Either way, we’re here for it.
Now, let’s get the lay of the land, shall we?
Our protagonist (or antagonist, you be the judge) appears to be a retired tech whiz who struck it rich during the dotcom boom. Picture a young Mr. Monopoly but with a garage full of electronics, not monocles. He has three kids and a bunch of nieces and nephews, all of whom he celebrates in a way that frankly makes most of us look like birthday slackers. Parties, gifts, the whole nine yards.
But here’s the kicker: his son isn’t getting the same confetti-and-cake treatment as his siblings or cousins. Why, you ask? Let’s just say his achievements lie in a galaxy far, far away from those of the traditional sort.
The Banquet of Bias
According to Mr. Monopoly Jr., his son isn’t exactly a varsity sports star or a future Rhodes Scholar. Instead, the kid has taken a more unconventional route to excellence: maxing out his fishing stat in Final Fantasy XIV. Yes, you read that right. A solid, prestigious 10/10 in virtual angling. Cast your judgments aside and reel in the shock, because this gets even better.
When his son expressed this achievement, one can almost hear the record scratch echoing through the family mansion. Picture this: the kid comes forward, proud as a peacock, holding his digital trophy high. Meanwhile, Dad is scratching his head, trying to figure out how exactly one writes up party invites for such a distinguished moment. “Come celebrate Johnny’s virtual trout conquest!” doesn’t quite have the same ring as “Come celebrate Johnny’s acceptance into MIT,” does it?
Let’s Break This Bad Boy Down
Point 1: Yes, the son’s achievement is in a video game. But in the digital age, who are we to scoff at accomplishments that mean something to someone? Heck, Twitch streamers and eSports pros make a living from this stuff! It’s a brave new world, darlings.
Point 2: Mr. Monopoly Jr. mentions that his son is on the spectrum, giving some added layers to this juicy narrative. The conundrum here isn’t just about different interests—it’s about fundamentally different worlds of achievement and what ‘success’ looks like in each. And let’s not forget, while his other kids might be racking up those NCAA scholarships, this young man might be well on his way to becoming the Bill Gates of pixelated perch fishing. You never know.
The Verdict Is In, Kind Of
The dad himself admits to being judgmental, which, spoiler alert, ding-ding-ding, is a part of human genetics. But is he an A-hole? That’s the million-dollar question. (I mean, he probably does actually have a million dollars, so it fits.) Before we throw him to the moral wolves, let’s hand down Roger’s Valedictorian Address on Parenting Mistakes.
Roger’s Hit-or-Miss Advisories
Tip 1: All achievements are relative. While it might seem silly to you, maxing out a stat in a beloved game could be monumental for a 15-year-old kid, particularly one on the autism spectrum. Even if it’s not Div 1 athletics, it’s a point of pride and self-worth. Get the kid a cake shaped like a fish or something! (Free tip for the party planners out there.)
Tip 2: It’s less about the ‘what,’ and more about the ‘who.’ Your kid is proud of something, and that should be enough to merit a little fanfare. A small acknowledgment of his joy could go a long way. Perhaps more private but no less meaningful celebrations would make the difference.
Tip 3: You’re not going to resonate with every interest or achievement your child has. That’s why there’s a village. Let other family members chime in and celebrate, too. Spread the love, and lessen the biased load.
Roger’s Sassy Opinion Time
Look, Daddy Warbucks, here’s the tea. You’ve unknowingly slipped into a bit of snobbery, equating worth with traditional notions of achievement. If the only thing you’re popping the champagne for is what’s deemed universally “impressive,” then you’re playing a very tired song, my friend. Your kid didn’t choose his interests to spite you, and sometimes, perhaps, achievements in pixels carry the heart and soul of well-being and happiness that no scholarship can touch.
So, are you the A-hole? Maybe, but more likely you’re just an oblivious parent in need of a nudge to see that the world is vast and colorful. Perhaps a party for a digital fishing champ could be just the way to start navigating those uncharted waters.
Until next time, never underestimate the power of a well-timed, sassy perspective. Cheers!
Original story
I won’t go into my kids and their cousins achievements. They are many and impressive.
I have supported all of their interests with time and money.
I made a fair bit of money a long time ago and I basically retired very young. I tried being a trust fund douche bag but I wasn’t cut out for it.
I worked hard to get my money and I wasn’t raised wealthy. I was just very lucky during the dotcom boom.
I have three children and three nephews, on niece. I am doing my best not to brag about them.
So I will say this. They took my money and time and used it to make amazing things happen for them.
And I celebrate their achievements. Both scholastic and athletic.
I throw parties for them and I give them great presents.
My son is jealous because I do not have parties for his achievements.
He is a great kid and quite smart. He isn’t a natural athlete but neither am I by any stretch of the imagination.
He dies well in school but I know that I will be paying out of pocket for him to attend whatever school he gets into.
I also host parties for him and his friends. I just don’t celebrate him as much.
He had complained about this. So last week I asked him what achievement he wants to celebrate.
I shit you not his answer was that he had maxed out his fishing stat in Final Fantasy 14.
I know all those words. I even know that game.
What I do not get is how a fifteen year old kid thinks that is on the same level as getting scouted for a Div 1 athletic scholarship.
I said he could have a party but that I wasn’t sending out invites with that as the reason.
He is upset and my wife thinks I’m being judgmental. Which I am.
I am judging him. And wondering where the hell I went wrong.
I’ll answer a couple of questions I know will be asked.
Yes I love my son very much.
Yes he is on the spectrum.
No I don’t think that is worth celebrating.
No I cannot bring myself to celebrate that.
AITA?