A Tale of Condo Wars: ‘The Parking Predicament’
Ah, the joys of condominium living: the HOA meetings, the small talk by the mailbox, and, of course, the inevitable clash over shared spaces. Grab your popcorn, folks; we’ve got a modern-day Romeo and Juliet, but replace the lovers with parking spaces and the poison with passive-aggressive text messages. This story is based on a real Reddit post from a real person. Let’s unravel this deliciously petty saga, shall we?
Setting the Scene: The Four-Unit Jungle
Picture a harmonious four-unit condo. Each unit is blessed with garage bays, idyllically described as wider than your typical garage to graciously fit two cars. Everyone’s happy. Or so it would seem until you get into the nitty-gritty measurements. Each resident gets a generous 8 feet 1 inch of space to rest their precious four-wheel chariots.
Enter the 4Runner: An Extra Nine Inches of Trouble
Our protagonist, let’s call him Sam, finds himself in deep doo-doo every time his neighbor, Sarah, parks her substantial 4Runner 9 inches over her allotted space. Her hefty ride is the Goliath to his humble David, making it darn near impossible for him to wiggle his car into the garage without performing automotive yoga.
After the first incident of this oversized-inconsideration-gone-rogue, Sam takes the high road. He texts, calls, and knocks on Sarah’s door. Nada. Not even a “Sorry, I was binge-watching Netflix.” Finally, Sam sends a polite but firm text warning her that his car—unhappily exiled from the garage—will make itself at home in the driveway instead, which results in an apology text the next morning from Sarah. A win for diplomacy? Hold your applause.
And Then, Round Two: Must Love Text Messages
Barely a week passes before history repeats itself. This is the sequel no one asked for, but it’s happening. So, Sam parks in the driveway again and sends another “keep the peace” text message, practically dripping with courteous suggestions and scholarly survey data. He even volunteers to have someone mark each parking spot. I mean, the guy deserves a Nobel Peace Prize for Neighbors at this point.
Sarah Drops a Bombshell
The clock strikes midnight (oh, the drama!), and Sarah responds. She is pregnant and can’t fit otherwise. Now, if you didn’t double-take at that, you’re clearly not as invested in condo politics as you should be. The plot thickens.
Fast forward to the following morning. Sarah, like an over-caffeinated rooster, calls Sam EIGHT TIMES at 5 a.m. Like most sane people, Sam is blissfully asleep and doesn’t answer. When he wakes up, he moves his car, wondering if he’s the bad guy in this vehicular vaudeville.
Sam Contemplates: AITA?
Our dear Sam, lost in the labyrinth of modern-day chivalry and pregnant neighbor parking conundrums, wonders—Am I The Asshole (AITA)? He contemplates hiring someone to mark the spots, the ultimate move in his genteel guerrilla war.
Roger’s Take: The Thin Line Between Parking and Paranoia
Alright, my dear readers, here’s where I, Roger, the sassiest writer you know, dish out my verdict. Sam, darling, you are definitely not the asshole here. In fact, your attempts to solve the problem are more diplomatic than a beauty pageant speech about world peace.
Let’s gloss over Sarah’s bombshell for a second. Is being pregnant a Get-Out-of-Parking-Restrictions-Free card? I think not. She might as well claim her stars align in a way that demands an extra nine inches. Sam’s reasonable, proactive approach is a masterclass in neighborly civility. The texts? A symphony of good intentions. The survey offer? A genius move.
Here’s the kicker—Sarah’s 5 a.m. calls are nothing short of a melodramatic overreaction. Who needs an alarm clock when you’ve got that kind of neighborly love, right?
In conclusion, Sam, park your doubts and stand your ground. Sometimes it takes a sassy pen and a marked parking spot to establish harmony in the condo jungle. And if all else fails, who knows—a strongly worded letter to the HOA might just do the trick. Until next time, remember: life is too short for bad parking etiquette. I, Roger, have spoken. ✌️
Original story
I live in a 4 unit condo. We have two large garage doors.
Each bay holds two cars. Think of like a normal garage at a normal house but they are wider to fit two cars.
We each are allotted 8 feet 1 inch of space. My neighbor drives a large 4runner.
She parks 9 inches over the space and it prevents me from parking my car in the garage. I usually manage but she sometimes parks further and I literally cannot fit into the garage.
If I street park I get a ticket. So first time this happened I called, texted, and knocked on her door to move her car over.
No response I then texted her saying that I will be parking in the driveway as I get a ticket for street parking sorry for any inconvenience. She apologized the next morning and said no worries.
One week later the same thing happens. I park in the driveway again and send a nice text message again saying “Hi there, I hope you’re doing well!
I wanted to mention that I’ve been having a little trouble fitting into my garage, and it seems like we might be using a bit more space than we’re each allotted. I want to keep things positive between us, so I thought it might help if I share the survey with you so we can both see the exact space we’re supposed to be using.
If it’s helpful, I can also arrange for someone to come by and mark out each spot. Thanks for understanding, and I’m sure we can sort this out smoothly “
She responds at midnight saying she is pregnant and can’t fit otherwise. That morning she calls me 8 times at 5am and I did not pick up as I was asleep.
As soon as I woke I moved my car.
Was wondering if I am the asshole here for trying to park in my garage space. I think I will have someone come mark the spots in the garage to prevent this issue.