A Picky Eater Dilemma: To Invite or Not to Invite? Roger Weighs In
Ah, the drama! All of it carefully wrapped in the innocuous foil of a dinner invite. Our tale today, dear readers, comes from the delightful rabbit hole that is Reddit. Yes, amidst the cat memes and conspiracy theories, lay this gem: ‘AITA (Am I The Asshole) for not inviting my picky eater DIL to my dinner event’. Spoiler alert – this one’s a doozy. Buckle up.
The Setup
So, here’s the scoop. Our protagonist, whom we’ll refer to as the Planner, is a food enthusiast. Scratch that. She’s a culinary thrill-seeker. She’s been stalking, I mean, following, a chef for years. And when said chef opened a tantalizingly exclusive restaurant nearby, she snagged a reservation like a ninja. This isn’t your average dining experience, either. We’re talking a fixed menu. You get what you get and you’d better love it or fake it convincingly.
The Planner, in all her blissful elation, decides to share this food heaven with five lucky souls: her two daughters and two sisters. The total headcount, including herself, is five – a lovely, cozy number. And mazel tov to her kind heart, she’s footing the bill. Cheers, Planner!
The Fly in the Ointment: Enter the Picky Eater
Here is where things get sinister. Planner has a daughter-in-law (DIL), and let’s just say DIL’s culinary repertoire makes a pigeon’s menu look diverse. The woman eats five things. Five. Chicken nuggets, mac and cheese, bread, plain pasta, and (maybe) a sad salad for the sake of green. Her food world is flat, and she’s damn proud of it. Anyone with a more adventurous palate is akin to a food snob in her eyes.
Knowing this, Planner chose not to include DIL on her culinary adventure list. Call it merciful foresight or sheer selfishness, the decision was made. “Why drag someone who’d gag at the sight of truffle foam and squid ink?” she thought. Makes sense, right?
The Family Feud
Ah, but this is a family affair, and what’s a family drama without some seasoning of complaints! News of the gathering reaches DIL, and she is not sitting this one out quietly. She raises her grievance – Why wasn’t she invited when others in the same social circle were?
Planner tried to sidestep the minefield, offering up a harmless explanation, “It’s just a small gathering.” But DIL wasn’t having it. Push came to shove, and Planner spilled the beans – “It’s because you’re a picky eater. I’m not paying for someone who won’t enjoy it, let alone try it.”
DIL’s reaction? She called Planner “cruel” and “exclusionary.” Ouch. That escalated quickly.
The Great Debate
To be honest, dear readers, this is a tricky meatball. On one hand, Planner just wanted a harmonious, food-loving evening without potential rain clouds of culinary discontent. Paying for a meal that’d fetch a heart attack look from DIL seemed illogical at best. Had DIL been obliged to attend, she might’ve felt like she was at one of Dante’s levels of Inferno – the anti-fine dining circle.
Yet, from DIL’s perspective, she’s feeling ostracized, like an odd duck who’s not cool enough for the others. Family gatherings are about bonding, memories, and yes, tolerating each other’s quirks – even if those quirks are a penchant for toddler-esque meals. Excluding someone, especially kin(!), is a social landmine best avoided.
Roger’s Verdict
So, where does your trusted culinary critic, Roger, weigh in on this? Grab your forks – here’s the meat of it.
Dear Planner, while I applaud your gastronomic bravery and generosity, I think you missed the boat here. Restaurants this exclusive often have a waitlist to the moon and back. Surely you could have deferred and snagged another reservation for a later date or perhaps spread the joy in smaller groups? Excluding DIL altogether on the basis of her food preferences, though logical, comes off as snobby and a bit heartless.
Dear Picky Eater DIL, lighten up. It’s food – not the end of the world. Not being invited to one dinner doesn’t devalue your existence or worthiness. If you’re really feeling FOMO, open up to new food experiences, but perhaps with less dramatic flair. Get involved in other family events and showcase your interest in bonding beyond the plate.
To sum it all up, this tale is a spicy reminder that, while shared meals can be the glue to family bonding, inclusivity trumps exclusivity – even when truffle foam is involved.
Your ever-sassy, gastronomically enlightened friend,
Roger
Original story
I will be as clear as possible. I like to try new food and there is a chief I have been following for years.
She open a restaurant near me a few years ago and it is almost impossible to get a spot. I was extremely lucky and got one.
It is a fixed menu and you eat what you are served for the most part. The menu changes or rotates about every week.
They serve unique dishes.
Anyways when I booked it I booked for only five people. I invited my sisters, my two daughters and me.
I also decided to pay for it all since I have a good job and wanted to treat them.
This is we’re the issue started, I have a DIL who is a picky eater. I didn’t include her in the invites because I know she wouldn’t eat it.
I can’t even be certain she would try dishes. She is the type of person that eat like 5 foods.
Everyone runs in the same-ish circle and I got a call asking why she was not invited since she knows everyone that was invited. I tried to be polite by saying it was just a small gathering and move the conversation along.
She kept pushing and I told her it is because she is a picky eater. That I am not paying for someone to not like the food, or not even try it.
She thinks I am very cruel for excluding her.