Hello, dear friends. It’s Mary here, your 60-year-old neighbor who’s walked more than a few miles in these here shoes. Now, if you’re looking for an intricate guide on how to always stay mad and never forgive, you might as well stop reading right now. Because honey, I’m going to tell you why letting go and forgiving not only makes sense but also brings the kind of peace you can’t find anywhere else.
But don’t you dare leave just yet! Come sit by the virtual fireside with me, and let’s chat about forgiveness. Yes, it’s one of the hardest things you can do. But wouldn’t you know it, it’s also one of the most liberating.
A Tale from Granny’s Porch
Well, let me tell you about the time when Bertie Maple from down the road did something that had me seeing red. Now Bertie, bless her heart, isn’t one to mince words. We were at the annual church picnic, and she casually mentioned that my apple pie tasted like it came from a store. Yes, a store. I couldn’t believe my ears. I nodded politely, but deep inside, I was boiling like a pot of my famous chicken noodle soup.
For weeks, every time I saw her in the pews or when she stopped by the market, I couldn’t help but shoot invisible daggers her way. I couldn’t sleep, and my prayers felt powerless because anger was tying my soul in knots. In church the following Sunday, our dear pastor gave a sermon on forgiveness. He said something that stuck with me, ‘Harboring resentment is like drinking poison and waiting for the other person to die.’
That hit me hard. Why was I letting Bertie, with her store-bought pie comment, upheave my happiness? So I prayed long and hard and decided to confront her. At the next picnic, I walked up to her, smiled (genuinely this time), and said, ‘Bertie, I forgive you for what you said about my pie. Can we be friends again?’ Imagine her shock! She blinked a couple of times before breaking into a smile and saying, ‘Oh Mary, I didn’t mean to hurt you. Your pie is the best.’ Friends, that weight lifted off me quicker than you can say hallelujah!
The Boomer Code and The Good Book
You see, forgiveness isn’t just a new-age mumbo jumbo; it’s one of the bedrocks upon which our great Christian faith is built. The Good Book tells us in Ephesians 4:32, ‘Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.’
Now, I know some of y’all might say, ‘But Mary, what if they don’t deserve forgiveness?’ Well, sweetie, if we got what we deserved, we wouldn’t be redeemable. It’s God’s grace that saves us, and it’s that same grace we ought to extend to others. It’s not about who deserves what; it’s about cleansing your soul of the heavy cloak of anger and resentment.
Forgiving Family? Now That’s a Tall Order
Family—the very word can give you a warm glow or a headache, sometimes within the same five minutes. There was a time when my brother and I didn’t speak for three years. Three years, folks. It was over something as silly as the inheritance left by our dear old Mama. He wanted to sell the family farm whereas I wanted to keep it; cherish it like the treasure it was. Words were said, and before you know it, we were like the Hatfields and McCoys.
Christmases passed, birthdays were missed, and I yearned for the brother I once knew. Then one day, as I was knitting another sweater I didn’t need (because heaven knows I have enough now to clothe a small nation), I realized how much I missed his laugh, his stories, and his companionship. Life’s too short, I thought. You know darn well that stubbornness isn’t going to bring him back. So I picked up the phone, put on my best elder sister voice, and said, ‘Jim, let’s not waste any more time. I forgive you, and I hope you’ll forgive me.’
Wouldn’t you believe it, he drove over the next day with a box of Mama’s doughnut holes and a big hug. We laughed, we cried, and oh yes, we even talked about the farm. We agreed to keep it in the family and found a way to honor Mama’s wishes and our own.
The Long and Short of It
Now, I’m not asking you to be a saint. Lord knows I’m far from it. But choosing to forgive those who have deeply hurt you is not about letting them off the hook. It’s about freeing yourself from the chains of bitterness. Life, my friends, is too precious to spend in the darkness of a grudge.
So next time you find yourself brooding over someone’s wrongdoings, remember this old woman’s words. It’s not easy, but neither was building a nation or keeping our faith alive through the generations. If we can do that, we can certainly choose the high road, and as they say, ‘The higher the road, less traffic.’
Till next time, keep your heads up, your hearts open, and don’t forget that forgiving doesn’t just bless the forgiven; it blesses the forgiver even more.