Introduction
Alright, folks, buckle up for a wild ride through the land of relationship double standards! Today’s juicy scoop comes straight from the digital grapevine of Reddit, where an innocent soul dared to question the dubious logic of their significant other. Let’s dive into this relationship drama, shall we?
The Drama Unfolds
Our protagonist (let’s call him Mike) has been romantically entangled with his girlfriend (who we’ll name Lisa) for a solid two-and-a-half years. Everything’s dandy until Lisa reconnects with an old friend, a gal she used to paint the town red with. Naturally, they hang out for drinks, and being the chivalrous partner he is, Mike tags along. Guess what? They hit it off splendidly.
While Lisa’s out rekindling old friendships, she’s also got a male colleague in her social sphere. Mike’s met the guy alongside his girlfriend, and life’s been peachy. They’ve double-dated and bonded over the type of toothy witticisms you’d find on Gilmore Girls. The colleague slid into Lisa’s DMs to chat occasionally, no big deal.
The Messaging Meltdown
However, life throws a curveball when Lisa’s rekindled friend and Mike realize they both share an obsession with the same genre of TV shows and movies. They add each other on social media and exchange messages about the latest plot twists in Squid Game or their opinions on whether Breaking Bad or The Sopranos takes the crown for best TV series ever. Harmless, right? Yeah, you’d think, wouldn’t you?
Well, Lisa’s having none of it. She tells Mike it’s weird he’s messaging her friend and demands he stop. When Mike, ever the diligent seeker of logic, asks why, Lisa hits him with, “It’s about respect.” Oh, Lisa. Talk about serving a mystery wrapped in an enigma!
Hypocrisy Déjà Vu
Determined to uncover the hidden meaning behind Lisa’s cryptic proclamation, Mike questions why it’s perfectly fine for her to chat with a male colleague but not for him to exchange a few innocent messages with her friend. Here’s where things get really ‘Twilight Zone’-ish. Lisa’s explanation? She’s known her colleague longer. Oh. Great. That clears it up. *Eye roll*
Mike, probably on the verge of growing a gray hair or two from frustration, points out the glaring hypocrisy. Yet, Lisa doubles down on the whole respect argument, repeating the same rhetoric with the tenacity of an old vinyl record stuck on replay.
Let’s Talk Double Standards
Alright, readers, let’s dissect this mess with the precision of a sushi chef. If we were to break out the relationship manual (you know, the one with lots of pictures and really big font), we wouldn’t find a clause that allows one partner to hog all the latitude in social interactions while chaining the other to a rock of boxed-in conduct. Private messaging, when done innocuously, is just that—innocuous. What’s good for the goose is good for the gander, or as I like to say, if you’re going to mix metaphors, make sure you’re not splashing paint on only one side of the canvas.
Roger’s Take
Now, if you’d humor an old sage like me, here’s my two cents (unadjusted for inflation, unfortunately). There’s hypocrisy, and then there’s hypocriiisssy (imagine jazz hands for emphasis). Lisa’s inconsistency isn’t just a tiny blunder—it’s a double standard with a capital ‘D’. If respect is on the table, make sure it’s served family-style with equal portions for all. Communication needs to be a two-way street without traffic jams of unreasonable demands.
So, Mike, dear Mike, you’re not the jerk here. You’re just someone caught in the crossfire of an unbalanced set of expectations. You’ve done everything to understand her concerns, but if her reasoning circles back to the same hollow ‘respect’ argument, it might be time for a serious heart-to-heart or a reevaluation of the boundaries in your relationship.
Stay sassy, stay snarky, and never settle for a one-sided game of friendship police.
Original story
I’ve been with my girlfriend for roughly two and a half years now. A few months ago she started talking to an old friend again that she hasn’t seen in a while.
They met up a few times for drinks and then my girlfriend invited me along for drinks with them so I could meet her. We all get along really well.
My girlfriend has a male colleauge that she’s friends with. I’ve met him a couple of times and we’ve even been on a couple of double dates with him and his girlfriend.
The colleague and my girlfriend are good friends and have each other on social media and message each other occasionally.
We met up with the friend a few more times for drinks and me and her friend like similar tv shows, movies and video games. Her friend added me on social media and I mentioned this to my gf.
It’s not abnormal, I’ve got quite a few of my gfs friends on social media. When one of the tv shows was on that me and her friend like she messaged me about it.
I told my girlfriend this and replied to her.
We’ve messaged a few times talking about movies and tv shows etc. My girlfriend told me she thinks it’s weird I’m talking to her friend and she thinks I should stop.
I asked what she thought was wrong with it and she just said I shouldn’t be messaging her. I asked again for an explanation but she wouldn’t give me one.
I mentioned that she messages her colleague who is a man so I think she’s being hypocritical to get annoyed at me for messaging a friend. She said it’s not the same and that I should stop messaging her friend.
I refused and again tried to get her to explain what she thought was so wrong about it. She just said it’s about respect.
I asked why it was different for her to talk to a friend of the opposite sex but not for me to talk to a friend but she just said she’s known this colleague longer than I’ve know the friend.
I said that’s not really a reason and she just repeated it was about respect and that I shouldn’t be disregarding what she’s saying and should be listening to her.
AITA for pointing out hypocrisy with my girlfriend and refusing to stop talking to a friend?