AITA for Thinking My Husband’s Family is More of a Hazard than a Hole-in-One?
Okay, darlings! Gather ’round because I’ve got a piping hot cup of drama tea to spill, inspired by a Reddit post that’s more thrilling than an episode of “Desperate Housewives.” Now, picture this: a long-awaited birthday bash for a delightful 5-year-old nugget, painstakingly planned by yours truly—or rather, our Reddit heroine. Sounds like a dream, right? Well, hold onto your party hats because this dream turns into a plot-twisting thriller faster than you can say “FORE!”
A Sweet Beginning
So, our story begins with a mom who works in healthcare. This poor soul juggled syringes and stethoscopes for months, juggling her job and planning a party for her daughter’s big 0-5 milestone. With military-like precision, she takes time off to make sure everything’s perfect. Invitations sent, decorations set, cupcakes iced—she’s the Martha Stewart of birthday splendor. And then, bam! Cue the disruptor-in-chief: her husband’s brother.
The Golf Course Cometh
The brother-in-law rolls into town like an unexpected piece of glitter in your handbag. Not for the niece’s birthday, mind you, but just because he can. And instead of thinking, “Hey, it’s my niece’s birthday. Maybe I should… I don’t know, participate?”, he drags our heroine’s husband off to the golf course for a seven-hour round of whacking golf balls and swapping tall tales. Seven hours. That’s not golf; that’s practically a sabbatical!
Poor mom thinks, “Okay, they’ll have their manly bonding time, and the next day I’ll get some help getting the house back in order. My mother-in-law’s got my back.” Or does she? Just when our heroine’s starting to breathe easy, the husband returns with breaking news.
The Great Golf Conspiracy
Apparently, the golf gods decreed an even earlier tee time the next morning. Six-flipping-thirty-A.M. And guess what? Mother-in-law can’t get up that early to babysit. Shocker! Is she a vampire waiting for sundown? Who knows, but the morning is strictly out of bounds for her.
TIME OUT
Our heroine, still riding the high of her daughter’s fabulous bash, is suddenly faced with the prospect of being a one-woman cleaning crew. She tells hubby, “No dice, no way, not tomorrow, bub.”
The husband, ever the diplomat, passes the buck faster than you can say “mulligan.” It wasn’t his decision, he says. It was his family’s. Bless his heart, but he’s about as decisive as a squirrel in traffic. Reddit mom, holding onto her sanity by a birthday balloon string, calls foul on the play. She points out that, unlike the tide or taxes, he can actually change his decision.
The Showdown
When Lovebirds finally get some privacy, the husband sheepishly agrees that his family’s timing was less than stellar. Yet, he still toddles off to the golf course the next morning, leaving supermom to solo parent while he plays Tiger Freaking Woods. Gutsy, isn’t he?
Our brave mom, naturally frazzled and overcaffeinated after solo-wrangling the kiddos, skips a planned visit to the in-laws that afternoon. I mean, if they wanted to see the kids, they should’ve put down the nine irons and picked up some responsibility. But alas…
Roger’s Sassy Judgment
Oh honey, where do I even start? First of all, sister, you have the patience of a saint! Juggling your healthcare job, throwing that birthday extravaganza, and dealing with family drama? I’d have cracked like a piñata at a 5-year-old’s party.
Your husband’s excuse? Please! There’s a difference between being controlled and being complicit. When did he become a puppet for his brother and father’s whims? The man needs to grow a backbone, stat! His family’s inconsiderate stunts during your child’s party? That’s just rude with a capital R-U-D-E!
And can we talk about the mother-in-law conveniently unable to morning-babysit? That’s a classic “not my circus, not my monkeys” move. C’mon, grandma, step it up—or at least set an alarm.
The Final Word
Bottom line: you deserve better. The fam needs an etiquette class, and hubby dearest? A masterclass in priorities. You’re not the A in this scenario, darling. You’re a warrior, plain and simple. But remember, it’s high time hubby took a swing at being a supportive partner who puts family first—even if he has to miss a tee time.
And there you have it, dear readers. One woman’s tale of birthday bash betrayal and golf course gall, dissected by yours truly, Roger. Until next time, keep your parties grand and your demands reasonable. Cheers!
Original story
We had a wonderful holiday weekend planned that included a large birthday party at our house for our 5 year old daughter. I work in healthcare, so I had to request off months ago to be off this whole weekend.
We planned the birthday party for months. The day finally came, after days of setting up.
6 days before the party, though, my husband’s brother announces he’s coming to town (not for his niece’s birthday, a coincidence). So, they are going golfing, which of course takes 7 hours, but my mother in law was going to watch them while I got the house back in order the day after that party.
My husband comes to me 30 minutes into the party and says, I am actually golfing tomorrow morning even earlier (leaving our house at 6:30am), and my mom doesn’t get up that early, so she can’t take the kids. I told my husband, no.
We can talk about it after the guests leave, but not going to work…we needed to rest and get our house back in order. That had been the plan for months.
Later we talked, and he said it wasn’t his decision to go earlier or that his mom couldn’t help. It wasn’t his decision, it was his family’s (brother and father).
I said you still have the option not to go, and that’s what I’m asking you to do, not tomorrow morning. He continues to say it’s not his decision.
I say it is. Ultimately I get to the point I’m saying his family is disrespectful our ours and of our time.
The worst part is that they told him of this change during our child’s party. Even worse, my husband seemed to agree the decision to change plans last minute seemed inconsiderate of them, but he still went.
My poor children had a crappy exhausted mom solo today. So he could golf.
AITA for not being a positive mom today? AITA for refusing to go to his parents house this afternoon after they got done golfing?