AITA for Calling Out My Wife on Her ‘Emotional Gatekeeping’? A Reddit Saga Unveiled
Buckle up, folks, because we’re about to dive headfirst into a marital jungle gym where feelings are high and patience is low. This juicy tidbit is yanked straight from a Reddit AITA thread, where real-life drama unfolds in its rawest, most unfiltered form.
The Players in Our Drama
Meet our key players: a 33-year-old entrepreneur dad—a.k.a. Mr. CEO—and his 30-year-old wife, a hard-working SAHM (stay-at-home mom) dipping her toes in the entrepreneurship waters while juggling three high-spirited children. Mr. CEO is frequently away, working the hustle and grind, while Mrs. Supermom is home battling the daily chaos with a side of sensory overload.
The Plot Thickens
The catalyst? A seemingly innocuous text. Mrs. Supermom, feeling the day’s weight, sends a text to Mr. CEO to let him know their daughter had a rough day and was crying out for daddy. Now, before you get all teary-eyed and grip your pearls, let’s dissect the scene.
The girl’s day spirals into tearful chaos thanks to some sibling rivalry and sheer exhaustion. Mrs. Supermom—on sensory overload—decides not to dial daddy’s fairy-godfather number for a chat. Instead, she aims for the golden arches: bedtime. Cue dramatic storm music 🎻.
The Phone Call
Mr. CEO, who’s no stranger to a little emotional turbulence, reads the ominous word: “overstimulated.” He dials faster than you can say “Midlife Crisis.” Our valiant CEO jumps onto the phone and heaps compliments on Mrs. Supermom. Picture a really intense Hallmark moment with just a touch of business parlance.
All seems hunky-dory until Mrs. Supermom gingerly steps into the landmine territory with, “Are you mad?” Mr. CEO, in his infinite wisdom (and perhaps a dollop of pent-up frustration), unveils the truth—a.k.a. his raw, unfiltered feelings.
The Great Explosive Debate
Mrs. Supermom detonates, accusing Mr. CEO of not respecting her daily trials and tribulations. Mr. CEO, the epitome of misunderstood heroes, wonders aloud how it feels to be gatekept. They pirouette around the minefield of mutual grievances until Mrs. Supermom sarcastically declares, “I’m hanging up now,” and click. Silence.
And here we are, dear readers, dissecting this marriage melodrama like modern-day Dr. Phils with a sharper wit and more audacity.
Wildly Unsolicited Opinion Time
All right, let’s get to the heart of this emotional souffle, shall we? Here’s Roger’s razzle-dazzle rundown.
1. Sensory Overload – It’s a Thing.
First, let’s tip our hats to Mrs. Supermom. Sensory overload is no joke, my friends. It’s like trying to juggle flaming swords while riding a unicycle through rush-hour traffic. Not letting the kid call might’ve been her way of preserving the last frayed nerve in her overstimulated brain.
2. Dad Deserves a Dial-In
But let’s not forget our globetrotting CEO dad here. Imagine being miles away, disconnected from the daily grind of fatherhood, only to hear your precious progeny couldn’t reach out because someone else was about to snap? Ouch. That stings harder than an unexpected tax audit.
3. The Art of Communication – Learn It, Live It, Love It
This whole debacle screams for better communication. Could’t Mrs. Supermom perhaps text Mr. CEO in real-time? “Listen, darling, the house is a madhouse, let’s schedule a call post-bedtime.” There, problem solved. No one devolves into a crying mess, no Tempest-In-A-Teapot blow-up required.
The Moral of the Story
So, AITA? Nah, Mr. CEO, you’re not TA. But neither is Mrs. Supermom. In the rollercoaster ride of parenting and partnership, it’s less about blame and more about a balance of compassion and crazy schedules. Parenting isn’t a competitive sport with medals for martyrdom. It’s an intricate dance, and communicating through the chaos can be their secret dance-floor move.
Stay sassy, stay sizzlin’. This is Roger, signing off. 🍸
Original story
Before we go into the situation, I (33M) own my own company, but the job requires me to be away from home for weeks at a time. When I am home it’s usually only for 4-5 days before leaving for work again.
My wife (30F) is a SAHM who is often overstimulated and who just recently started her own small business. Now on with the situation.
So my wife text me this evening saying I may want call my daughter tomorrow and talk to her, because she’s had a rough day. According to her my daughter was tired our two boys were fighting and this caused my daughter to become upset and start crying for me.
My wife being overstimulated didn’t let her call me so she could talk to me. When I asked why my daughter wasn’t able to call me my wife responded with “I was overstimulated and just wanted them to go to sleep.
”
When I read the word “overstimulated” I called her. My wife’s love language is affirmation and I’ve learned that calling and giving her words of affirmation helps her calm down.
We talk for several minutes with me telling her how great of a job she’s doing with the kids and with sales at her business. Because honestly she has been doing great with keeping the business up and holding down the home front.
Then she asked, “are you mad that I didn’t let her call you?” I said “no but it does upset me when I find out one of my children was literally verbally crying for me but wasn’t allowed to call me.
”
This caused her to blow up on me saying I don’t know what she goes through on a daily basis because I’m always gone for work and that she feels like I don’t respect her feelings as much as I do our children’s feelings. So I brought up that this wasn’t the first time she’s done this and asked her how it would make her feel if one of the kids were crying for her but weren’t allowed to call her.
She again said I wasn’t considering her feelings. So I asked her why she doesn’t let them call me if they’ve been “bad”.
And she replied “I’m hanging up now. I don’t appreciated being told I gate keep my kids phone time with their dad as a form of punishment or that your not respecting that I didn’t let her call because I was overstimulated.
Call her in the morning.” And she hung up.
I never once downplayed the fact she was overstimulated. I just pointed out that I don’t want my kids to EVER feel like they can’t call me, when they need me to talk to them after a bad day, because it might cause someone else to be upset.
So AITA?
TL;DR my wife didn’t let my daughter call me when my daughter was upset and is now mad that I implied she gate keeps their phone time with when she’s overstimulated or trying to punish them.
Edit: I call my wife and kids every morning and FaceTime them for about two hours each night.