Oh, honey, do I have a story for you today. Buckle up because we’re diving into the juicy drama of a real-life Reddit post. Picture it: a friendship lasting 15 years, a cocktail of unrequited love accusations, and a dash of a sassy lesbian who’s frankly just had enough.
Meet the Players
Our heroine is a fabulous 40-year-old lesbian (let’s call her Linda) who’s been bravely navigating the friendship seas with her long-time pal, who we’ll name Becky. Becky is a bisexual married woman with a girlfriend on the side—nothing if not modern, right? Over the years, Linda has never, ever hinted at or expressed any romantic interest in Becky. Nada. Zilch.
But Becky? Oh, she’s got this whole “I need to announce to everyone within earshot that I would never date Linda” shtick going on. And it’s not a sporadic thing. It happens every. Single. Time. They’re out. Especially when the alcohol is flowing at the bar or club.
The Habitual Humiliation
Imagine trying to enjoy your mojito while your friend, who’s supposed to know you better than anyone, loudly clarifies to random strangers that you, Linda, are absolutely not her type. It’s like a public denial of a proposal you never made. Gross, right?
Linda, our patience-of-a-saint protagonist, initially laughs it off with a joke about Becky being married and not her type. Humor as a shield? Classic move. But folks, even the strongest among us have limits.
Becky’s antics go beyond cringe-worthy into the realm of downright disheartening when she tells strangers that Linda’s apparently been pining for her since she came out a decade ago. Last straw, meet Linda’s back. Last night, after another round of this nonsense, Linda did what any self-respecting woman would: she simply left, taking an Uber home, leaving Becky stewing in her own bizarre assumptions of unrequited love.
Echoes of Insecurity
This is where we get to the meat of the matter, darlings. Becky thinks that Linda’s hurt feelings are proof of secret affections. Oh, sweetie, how delusional. Sometimes people just want to be respected, y’know?
The Moment of Truth
Linda’s contemplating distancing herself from Becky, and she’s wondering if that makes her the asshole. Spoiler alert: Absolutely not. There’s a fine line between being sensitive and demanding basic decency. Linda isn’t upset because she harbors secret feelings; she’s upset because a supposed friend continuously undermines her dignity.
Friendships should be a two-way street of respect and understanding. And when one friend treats the other like a walking stereotype or a pining teenager, it’s time to bring out the scissors and cut those ties.
Joan’s Sassy Conclusion
Linda, darling, listen to your Auntie Joan: You deserve better. If Becky can’t grasp that this isn’t about unrequited love but about basic respect, then distancing yourself is the most self-loving thing you can do.
Remember, a true friend builds you up, not tears you down in front of others. It’s common decency sprinkled with a hint of empathy. And if Becky can’t provide that? Tell her to jog on. Life’s too short for superficial friendships that chip away at your self-worth.
In the immortal words of RuPaul, “If you can’t love yourself, how in the hell are you gonna love somebody else?” Can I get an amen up in here?
Amen. Now go out there and live your best life, Linda. You’ve got this.
Original story
I (40F) have a friend of 15 years. I’m a lesbian and she’s bi and married to a guy and has a girlfriend (he’s ok with this).
I’ve never hit on her or even hinted at us hooking up.
However, when we hang out, and especially when we’re chatting with others at the bar or club, she’s got to make a point to whomever that we’re not together and even though I’m gay and she’s bi, she’d never hook up or date me.
Every. Single. Time.
It’s always awkward and the people we’re talking to often look at me with pity like I’m going to be heartbroken. I usually laugh it off with a “you’re not my type and married” joke, but it’s getting old and my feelings are hurt even though I don’t have feelings for her.
When I try to talk about it, she just says my feelings wouldn’t be hurt if I didn’t want it to happen so she’s just making it clear every time we hang out so I don’t get any ideas.
Last night we were out again and as I was taking a vid of the dancing, I happened to catch her in the background again telling another stranger that she’d never date me and I’ve been in love with her since I came out 10 years ago. Shortly after that I ended up taking an Uber home (other friends were there) and today she’s pissed that I left and again thinks it’s because of “unrequited” feelings.
At this point I’m just over it and want distance. But does that make me an asshole, sensitive, upset for the wrong reason?