Darlings, pour yourself a cup of something strong because today, I’m dishing out on a real Reddit story that’s left the internet divided, and trust me, you’ll want to stick around for Roger’s Hot Take at the end. So, in the red corner, we have our protagonist, a supermom on wheels, glittering in the glow of financial stability thanks to her master plumber hubby, Micheal. And in the blue corner, we have sister Bethy, a fellow stay-at-home mom, financially floundering and evidently green-eyed over our protagonist’s cash flow. Ding, ding, ding! Let the Wallet Wars begin!
Imagine the scene: two sisters sipping coffee, babies presumably cooing in the background, when suddenly the topic of swimming lessons and playgroups transform the café into a financial battleground. Our protagonist, bless her, innocently shares tales of mommy luxury – swimming classes and exclusive playgroups, unaware that she’s about to ignite the fuse of financial envy in Bethy. Bethy, drowning in the realities of scraping by on a teacher’s salary in a stingy state, can’t hide her resentment. She sees red, not just from the café’s overpriced espresso but from the revelation that her sister, yes, her own flesh and blood, is swimming in a pool of disposable income.
But wait, it’s about to get spicier. Bethy, in a move bold enough to make any soap opera villain proud, goes for the jugular – she asks for her sister’s ‘allowance.’ Yes, dearies, you heard right. Not a loan, not a one-off financial assist – she wants the monthly jackpot. Our protagonist, already juggling physio appointments and the challenges of motherhood on wheels, is taken aback. Her refusal sends Bethy storming out faster than a hurricane, leaving behind a trail of guilt and an unpaid coffee bill.
Now, you’re probably wondering, “Roger, darling, whose side are you on?” Well, honeys, here’s Roger’s Hot Take: There’s a line thicker than the Great Wall of China between helping and enabling. Our protagonist is living her best life, not on a pile of inherited gold but on a foundation of hard work and sacrifice. Bethy’s request reeks of entitlement faster than a fish market on a hot day. It’s one thing to ask for help in a crisis, quite another to eye someone’s lifestyle and demand a piece of the pie.
Sure, empathy is essential, and perhaps our leading lady could sprinkle a few kindness coins Bethy’s way, but to fund her life under the guise of sisterly duty? That’s a no from me, darling. Financial responsibility isn’t a relay race where you pass your burdens like a baton. Micheal’s advice about Bethy and her husband reassessing their financial strategy hits harder than a shot of espresso. It’s not about denying help, but rather about empowering our loved ones to fish rather than feeding them fish, stilettos firmly planted on the ground.
In the tempest of money, morals, and mobility aids, let’s not forget the power of self-care and financial independence. Our protagonist is not the villain for wanting to keep her gold coins clinking in her own purse. So, to answer the big question – AITA for not opening my wallet to my sister’s financial woes? Roger says, decidedly, NTA.
As the curtain falls on our Wallet Wars, remember, my dazzling readers, it’s not about being stingy but about understanding when to help and how to help without sacrificing your sequins and sparkle. Until next time, keep those purses and principles tight, and always, always stay fabulous!
Yours in sass, Roger.
Original story
My (26F) sister (32F) “Bethy” and I are both stay-at-home moms. I have 1F twins; she has three sons, 6M, 4M, and 2M.
My husband, Micheal, is a master plumber who makes excellent money; he owns his own business, and I couldn’t be prouder of him. I used to be a librarian; I have my MLS and bachelor’s in Education. During the birth of our girls, on the way to the hospital in the ambulance, we hit a speed bump, and I was injured. I am now an ambulatory wheelchair user and attend physical therapy, as I am learning to walk again. I hurt from my hips down, but my babies are worth it. We decided I would be a SAHM after my first surgery, and my husband gives me $3000/month to use how I want to, as “payment for being such a good mom” We are extraordinarily blessed financially, and I’m happy being able to see my girls growing up.
Bethy’s husband, Jackson, is an elementary school teacher, but teaching doesn’t pay much in our state. Bethy has been a SAHM for the entirety of her marriage and is used to having to scrimp and save for things.
She asked me out for coffee recently and I accepted. I was chatting with her when I mentioned that our girls would start baby swim classes soon. I was happy the pool was wheelchair accessible. Bethy started ranting about how expensive swimming lessons are and how she could never afford to put her boys in swimming. I said I was also excited about playgroup this week, as I had been nervous to go the first time we had gone because none of the other moms and dads in the group used mobility aids. When I mentioned the name of the playgroup I go to with my girls, Bethy became angry because it’s one of the more expensive playgroups.
She was angry because “I knew money was tight.” and “I didn’t even think to invite her and Jackson’s son because then she wouldn’t have to pay for daycare. She then asked if my husband gave me an allowance. She was a bit angry, and people were starting to stare, so I said yes and asked her to keep her voice down. She wondered how much it was, and I told her. She asked if I could give it to her, and I told her no because I like to treat myself after my physio appointments, and I want to save as much as possible for a rainy day fund.
Bethy said she and her husband have nothing but rainy days and left the restaurant without paying. I feel embarrassed and ashamed that I’m not helping her when I know I could. Still, when I asked Micheal he said that my sister could get a job and reminded me that I became a SAHM because it was something we agreed we were financially stable enough to do as well as because of my mobility limitations. He also said I deserve nice things and shouldn’t have to give them up just because my sister wants me to.
I feel conflicted, AITA? If more people think I am, I’ll consider giving her the monthly payment; I feel guilty for not helping.